This morning sucked.
I had an early flight and after a late night, I woke up at 3am (an hour before the alarm).
A conversation from yesterday played on my mind as I lie in bed – a conversation that seemed to upset and confuse me even more now that my mind was tired. It was consuming much of the little energy I felt I had, and while I knew I could shift my mood and perspective with any number of exercises or practices, I did little to help myself and just kept on feeling emotionally triggered as I thought about it.
Around 3:30, I realised that rather than waking Freebs to take me to the airport as planned, I could see if our friend (who lives nearby and works at the airport) could take me with him. He was awake, but I hadn’t given him enough notice for him to get me there and get to work on time. Damn. I guess Freebs (who really doesn’t like getting up while it’s still dark) will take me. I’d only realised late last night that the earliest train was not going to work for my flight time. I felt the guilt and self-anger of not planning better rise up inside me as I went to the garage to look for some duffle bags I know we have somewhere and could only find the suitcase with a missing wheel. My alarm to wake Freebs up rang, so I figured the suitcase would have to do and pulled it out.
As we drove out of the garage, I looked forward to getting a juice at my favourite place in the airport, and smiled.
When I got to the airport food court, I realised that my favourite place wasn’t open (and didn’t look like it’d open before 5:35 when my flight boarded). I found another place to have breakfast and a small bottled juice. “Five dollars?! I could have got a nice fresh real juice for $7 or $8!” I exclaimed in my mind, looking at my receipt.
That outraged voice was followed by another, much wiser voice: “You’ve gotta stop.”
I knew that if I didn’t shift out of this frustration, disappointment and dissatisfaction, it’d taint my entire day. I wanted to focus on more positive things, rather than wasting time and energy on complaining. I knew that my tiredness was skewing my perception, but that was no reason to stay like this. I pulled out my journal and got to writing. I realised so many great things that made today awesome. I closed my journal and hurried to my gate, my mind flowing onto so many more amazing things that I am so grateful for that aren’t on this list.
My boyfriend is the best guy in the entire world. I am so grateful to have someone so supportive, helpful and loving in my daily life.
Check in, bag drop and going through security were smooth and easy.
Traffic was great on the way to the airport.
My breakfast was hot and tasty.
My uncle is giving me a lift from the airport to my Dad’s.
Sometimes our days don’t start nicely – maybe we’re tired and grumpy, maybe things don’t go to plan or the weather isn’t as nice as we would have liked. Whether we are happy and have a great day is still our choice.
There are so many great things in our lives, and if we just take a few minutes to focus on them rather than the things weighing us down/bugging us, we can shift the filter that we are viewing and experiencing the world through, and have the happiness and inner peace that we want.
Why is today awesome for you?!
This morning sucked.